My baby is here but Im dreadful

Hi guys
Im still really bad its like my body is trying to compensate for the bump being gone feel light when I walk and walking like a drunk person getting spins and been having dizzy dreams when I do sleep. I honestly have never felt so ill and dizzy in my life I really feel like I wont get better from this. Midwife came this morning I told her what Im going through and she looked horrified and asked how I can carry on and how I can look after my kids I just said I didnt know and started crying.
My son is lovely but Im so ill I cant enjoy him even looking down to feed him sets me off so I cant look at him when Im feeding him. Would rather die than live like this :’(

Blondie,

Firstly congratulations on the birth of your son!

But I’m so desperately sorry that you feel like this. Your post is heart breaking. However, we’ve all now got to come up with a plan to try to help you. So… I think you’re in the UK… Are you under a specialist yet? A neurologist or a neurotologist? If not, call the GP/get down to the surgery. They can give you a vestibular suppressant- perhaps stemetil to help calm the system in these first few days/weeks after giving birth. And maybe a low dose of Valium (not enough to make you sleepy).

If you are breast feeding though, this could be an issue- you may want to weigh up the benefits of you being on these drugs versus the benefits of your baby being on breast milk- if you are feeling this bad, I’d be tempted to go with the drugs and feed your son on formula.

I think you need to go to the doctor and explain what you’ve just explained to us here. I hope your GP understands your problem- hence why I asked if you are seeing a specialist who might be better placed to understand MAV and how it works. But if not, maybe you could print off some of the info sheets here so the GP gets a better understanding of what is happening in your brain and why this has happened to you.

Lastly, please know that you WILL get better. Your body has been through a hell of a lot! We all have our relapses but you have just given birth!- A major stress on your body (and your brain). It needs time to settle. But I promise you, you WILL get better. In the future, you will look back to this time and see how strong you are and just what you can get through.

Please please take care of yourself and please let us know here if we can do anything for you. I feel for you so much.

XX

Donna

Congratulations on the birth of your son and well done for getting through the birth, I hope it wasn’t too horrendous! I have been thinking of you and glad things didn’t drag on too long as I know you have been suffering a lot recently.

Really sorry to hear you feel so rotten. I know just how you feel and it is such a horrible scary condition that takes away the fun from things we should be enjoying. Like Miss Moss says we need to think logicially about your situation now. You were pregnant and your hormones were all over the place, you also halved your meds during this time. Those factors combined would have lowered your migraine threshold considerably and that is why towards the end of your pregnancy and now straight after the birth the cumulative effect is the MAV has reared its ugly head in a big way. You need to remember that you got this under control before and you WILL again. I think Miss Moss has given you some good advice about contacting your GP, I would ask for a home visit. You have a MAV diagnosis so they should understand what is going on and be prepared to prescribe whatever you feel would help right now. I know you wanted to get straight back on the ami and maybe you could get some valium to take the edge off things for the time being.

Remember you expected you may feel worse after the birth for a few weeks so hold on to the fact that in a way you were mentally prepared for that but you know things will settle down. I know it is hard getting through each day when you don’t even want to move you head. Can your husband take time off work to help you out… I hope so because I think you need some support right now.

Just hang in there Donna and things will improve. Thinking of you xx

HI Donna
I am so sorry but not surprised. That not anything more demanding a body and brain can go through than pregnancy and birth. It will have to readjust iteself. Just remember only a few months ago you were really well and will be back there soon. Fantastic post from missmoss, she is right plan of action ready!
The GP can give you a vestibular supressant like stugeron or stemitil and Valium which is also a vestibular supressant (your GP may not know this).
You can increase your amitriptyline which aswell as treating the MAV has anti histamine properties. When I was on ami if I had a MAV attack I would take an extra 10mg as this calms the brain.
You may also want to ask to be refered to your neurotolgist to discuss pizotifen or topomax. Remember a GP can also prescribe pizotifen. It is a very well known “safe” drug so GPs are happy to prescribe it. You may have to come off the ami though.
YOU WILL GET BETTER and ba back where you were XXXXXXXX

Thanks guys

He is gorgeous I had him sunday night at home I had no pain relief at all I was too scared of feeling more dizzy so had nothing, I was glad he was a fast labour but it wasnt something I enjoyed especially spinning the whole time but it proves how strong I actually am I suppose I dont think a lot of people would of coped with what I did.

Feel so strange when I walk now my bump has totally gone flat and I look like Ive lost loads of weight Im tiny and my body seems confused by that so Im very off balance and walking into walls near enough. Its such an odd feeling.

Im going to see if cant get doctor out tomorrow if I feel this bad to see if he can give me anything the weird thing is my ears are hissing like mental too and I dont know why but Im sure its making things 10X worse. I love m children I just want to be a mommy to them again if I could just go back to my baseline I would be so happy x

Congratulations!!

Don’t delay in getting back on meds to get it under control. If not, you will continue the downward spiral and it will not get better on its own with the sleep deprivation of a newborn.

If you are nursing, you can safely take some meds for MAV, so don’t let anyone tell you otherwise. If you need an online resource, send me a message. Think of the mothers that are prescribed antidepressants after birth and continue to nurse–many of these same antidepressants can be helpful for MAV.

Don’t continue to despair, there is hope and you WILL feel better!! Sleep as much as you can–get your husband to help with this!! You need it right now!!

All the best to you!

Please know you and yours will be in my prayers tonight.
Judy

My heart aches for you as I was in your exact same position 2 1/2 years ago. My MAV came after delivering my 3rd child, a big difference though is I was not diagnosed for almost 18 months after Boston’s birth, so I suffered greatly not knowing what was going on. I also had major childbirth complications that made the MAV diagnosis even more difficult. So, I would say get on meds ASAP, except a lot of help cooking and cleaning, get plenty of rest, drink lots of water and most importantly please don’t be too hard on yourself, it will only make your circumstances worse!! You learn what things are and are not important right now. Getting well is, a clean house isn’t, etc… Snuggle in bed with the baby when you can’t lift your head off the pillow, etc.! It is so tough. I did really well on Nortriptyline, it has since pooped out on me and I am trialing Propranolol, which so far has only taken away the headaches. I hope you find some relief soon! Bless you!!

Dear Blondie, as a mum, I get very touched by your post. Because he is here and is gorgeous, but it is horrible for you!
I think that birth etc. is the most worse thing for MAV. And I can not imagine being alone at home with a newborn and being so dizzy.
Have you had success with medication before? As someone else said, maybe it is the best to start up again, although it might be the end of nursing. (I would think it was the better and safer to have a happy non-dizzy mom than a a dizzy-nursing-mum).

Homebirths are fantastic. I am SO sorry that you do not have the magic beginning with him, because of this MAV-thing. Fortunately he is still here when you get better, and then the magic will be yours. I did’nt have the cronik MAV until after my births, it breaks my heart that you didn’t have this experience without the spins :frowning:

Best to you!

Hi Blondie,
Your post just broke my heart. Having a new baby should be a wonderful yet tiring experience. It is such a shame that you are dealing with MAV at the same time. I don’t have any real advice but I wish you the best.

Deb