Relationship anyone?

Ok, I need to know for sanity’s sake…have any of you been able to start a relationship with this crappy illness?
I’ve been dealing with Meniere’s since 2006 and now this since 2011 (still not diagnosed and waiting for neuro appointment) but geez I feel like I’m wasting valuable time here to maybe have a glimpse at happiness one day.

Of course u will. My husband and I have become closer over this without a doubt! xxxx :stuck_out_tongue:

My sweetheart and me, too.

david and lizzie, that is really great to hear. did you both start dating your partners while you had mav, or did you meet pre-mav?

Met LONG before MAV as I am 31 now and have only been dizzy for a year, we met when we were 23 but I had ALOT of episodes of odd neuro stuff long before I got dizzy last year…so he’s used to all the hospital appointments poor man!! xx

You are already in relationships and I agree that illness (hard times) either makes or brakes a marriage but I am a single mother and when I meet someone, I am always very honest and tell them about my illness and they disappear before I have time to finish my sentence…

I know that they are probably jerks and that the right guy will stick around and support me…I am just feeling sorry for myself at the moment as I realize I am not getting any younger so bear with me please :slight_smile:

Thank you all for your support xx

I don’t even know where to begin with this one… sigh

If I met someone new, I would copy and paste part of the survival guide from here. In fact, it’s on my notes on my facebook page.
That sums up what we’re dealing with and what can be difficult.

I try not to moan, and just state facts.

And I say, sometimes I need to take things slowly and stay in- that’s ok, because then you save money :slight_smile:

I worry that I’m not as social as people like to be. But hey, everyone’s getting older and poorer and going out less :slight_smile:

People often surprise you with their understanding and compassion. They are nice men out there. You just need to find the diamonds in the dirt

i am married and my wife is supportive but I have to admit having a relationship with this condition is very hard. Well I find it hard. It would be easier if both people in a relationship had it. You can explain to someone about this condition but until you have had it you can’t come close to understanding. I might start up a dating agency for dizzy people :smiley:

Haha…if you do, I will be the first to sign up!!

i think it is important to remember that there are other people out there who have very serious chronic health issues besides dizziness- and i bet these people are looking to date too. i tend to think everyone else out there is perfect and has no health issues but that is far from the truth. i hate to see this as a “disability” but i have heard of dating websites for people out there with “disabilities”- this could be something to look in to.

I remember back when i was totally healthy i joined a dating website and met this really nice guy- on the 3rd date he told me he had crohns disease. at the time i didnt realize how hard it must have been for him to tell me that- but here was this guy with a very serious debilitating illness out there trying to date. things didnt work out between us mostly because i was immature (having nothing to do with his illness) but my point is that there are others out there.

Another case in point- i was complaining about dating with this thing and my aunt was telling me that she knew a woman who used a walker and had m.s. who met someone and got married with it- its not impossible- and there are others out there who may not be dizzy, but they might have something else just as debilitating, and they dont want to be alone either!

and actually in fact in retrospect i wish i had been mature enough to be in a relationship with that guy (or any guy lol)- because he probably would have been more understanding than the average guy when something like mav comes along…lol i probably blew my chance at greatness but i was 21 what did i know :wink:

We were together for quite a long time before MAV appeared. However, another health condition appeared shortly after we started seeing each other. And it didn’t push her away.

I have to admit that she’s very special; she wouldn’t have put up with my assholity for so many years, before I finally appreciated her as she warrants, if she weren’t.

— Begin quote from "robertgreen99"

i am married and my wife is supportive but I have to admit having a relationship with this condition is very hard. Well I find it hard. It would be easier if both people in a relationship had it. You can explain to someone about this condition but until you have had it you can’t come close to understanding. I might start up a dating agency for dizzy people :smiley:

— End quote

haha great idea Robert… the other thing is, that no 2 dizzy people are the same, but at least they can be empathetic to each other knowing the difficulties of the condition.

the past 12 months has been such a wipeout for me in many ways, and then with a near constant beat in my head, I had hoped to be able to make an effort to meet someone,
but didn’t hav much hope. until i stumbled across this forum and have found some confidence in myself again, all the pieces started to fall into place, i can have hope

My rock, who I thought would stand by me through the thick and the thin, left me last weekend. He thought I would get ‘better’ and can’t stand the restrictions this illness puts on me and inevitably our relationship so he bowed out. Certainly won’t be looking for anyone else till I can look after myself fully.

Ang
It’s always painful finding out that a partner doesn’t ‘live up to’ the trust, love and support you have given them and especially when they don’t return that. However, look on the plus side and the years you might have wasted staying with the guy and him maybe bailing out when some other misfortune happened.
There are plenty of guys who have lots more empathy and caring (which he obviously lacks) and maybe one day something will happen to him where he needs support and he will be left out on a limb. I do believe what goes around comes around!!
So concentrate on getting well but be sure, in this life there will always be obstacles in one form or another so I wish for a loving, caring partner to share life’s journey with you who will 'last the distance!!
Barb

I hope you’re not setting on yourself a goal or demand that’s impossible–for anyone–when you say, “look after myself fully.”

Thanks Barb for your encouraging words. I am just trying to get myself together but finding it a bit difficult at moment. I will get there one day :slight_smile:

David, what I meant was I want to get to a stage where I was a few years ago when I was able to manage my illness by myself but since my big attack I have had to rely on lots of people physically and emotionally to get through a day. I want to be independent again and my partner leaving me has made me want and need that more because I am now alone!! :frowning: