what kind of stressors do you guys all have and how do you handle them?
my 93 year old mother is bored because i havent been able to drive much to get her out and it’s getting close to Christmas. We take her when my BF is around but i don’t dare drive and get out somewhere and have an attack with someone with me.
it’s a 53 year old guilt trip - i’ve always had guilt from her. this is something i’d love to work through with a therapist. i get so tired of it. i told her how would you like to be my age and not able to drive or go places and do things. she is healthier than i am i swear.
it’s just so hard cuz it’s like communicating with a 5 year old.
that and work - i love my job but i worry when im sick and having to get there and all that.
just wondering what all of you deal with.
Hi Chris –
I guess when I’m feeling stressed by stuff, I just suck it up. I don’t sweat the small stuff in life much but things like a job interview will definitely throw a curve ball at me. So what I do in that situ is prepare as best I can, make sure I get a solid 8-9 hours sleep, take valium before bed, and then get on with it. There are days when the alarm goes off and I don’t want to get out of bed because my head feels lousy or my body aches but I tear the alien off my face and just do it.
Things are never as bad as my mind will sometimes make them out to be. I know that so push through it when any catastrophic thinking pops up.
well put Scott i agree.
I just have a lot of stress from driving cuz of dizzies and dealing with elderly mother - i need to take care of myself though right now that’s most important.
i’m hoping when i get the nerve to get on an AD i will be calmer!
My current stresses are:
Business/income tanking over the last couple-three years; I deal with this sometimes by fussing over “what am I going to do, this ain’t working?” and sometimes by focusing on doing what I can do and reminding myself that I’ve saved over the years, and I live cheap.
Angst over my sweetheart’s unhealthy habits, and their consequences for her and for me; I deal with this by supporting her efforts to change, by confronting her with how I feel, by patting myself on the back for respecting boundaries; and by talking to a shrink.
Frustration and uncertainty about book sales; I deal with this by reminding myself that I’ll know what’s been happening when I see my next royalty statement–and that I could call my editor and just ask. I deal with it also by reminding myself that I achieved an important goal for a different, self-published volume, and if I want it to sell more, there’s things I can do. I also tell myself that the next book project should have wider appeal.
Aches and pains and clicking joints; I deal with this by swimming, getting rolfed, and reminding myself that I could do more stretchy stuff.
Frustration over the amount of time I put into volunteer groups; I deal with this by keeping an eye on whether I may want to terminate my participation.
Worry about reduced vision, eyesight, and, errr, braininess; I deal with these by acknowledging them, and to some degree by grieving.
Fear that my mother will suffer, maybe even die, because she takes poor care of herself; I deal with this by expressing my concerns to her and sharing them with my sweetheart; I deal with it by visiting and helping in any way she’ll permit me, nudging her in what I see as healthier directions; I deal with it by taking her behaviors as object lessons for me to learn from, and finally by honoring her autonomy.
David, thank you so much for sharing. It’s great to talk to everyone on this forum and get to know them.
I have a lot of family stress and of course health stress.
holidays stress me out - always have - i’ll be taking some valium this thursday for thanksgiving i’m sure. i’m just not a fan of holidays - yeah i know i’m strange probably. I like Christmas a little bit beter than thanksgiving. Hope i’m not afraid to eat@!