My sense of reality is a little warped ...

Mine originally started in 2014 when I was about 16. It changed into a new kind of disorientation begining of this year. No longer really dizzy/vertigo due to medication but my sense of reality is a little warped. I feel dirty for saying this but I kinda miss it. I used to play games and test my limits see what I can and can’t do. Attempt 4D movie theaters (look it up), climbing ladders, rock climbing etc. I don’t recommend any of what I did out of safety because I’m mildly an idiot, but I learned to try and have fun with and push myself. Even if you throw up in the parking lot of the 4D movie theater 15 minutes into Star Wars Rise of Skywalker where the first 10 minutes are a space battle spinning all around. :sweat_smile: I guess I just communicated with what I had going on internally and tried to create an understanding, almost a symbiotic relationship between myself and my vertigo. For the most part it helped if not physically mentally.


Wow …laughter is good medicine, you had me laughing…Have a Blessed day :hugs:

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Moved your Post to a dedicated Topic to act as your intro, hope you don’t mind!

First: welcome!

The vestibular sense is closely related to sense of self, ego. This can translate into weird feelings of disassociation and related feelings. It was the first thing I felt … almost an out of body experience and I thought I’d had a stroke.

Btw, I looked at your bio (thanks for filling it in) and I notice you love video games - do you ever wonder if they have been a contributing factor?

I often wonder that if you play 3D first person games a lot, this will irritate the brain as you are forced to disconnect your inner ears from movement …

We had another user here (@Kon) who first encountered these symptoms after an extended gaming session (see Diagnosed with migrainous vestibulopathy)

I wonder if the stress of gaming might also be a root cause …

Just read his post and I had so many similarities to @Kon . It was almost uncanny. I at first thought the same thing with the headphones as I just got a new set before, but since I also fell off a ladder the day it got bad and got the headphones 2 days prior I could never really put my finger on which caused it to be worse. Video games were hard with the slant and honestly there are times I still notice it when I game. It’s not as bad as I feel the meds helped a lot. I work a mildly stressful job aka customer service manager in a not so nice neighborhood so I live off stress. The competitive edge with video games while mildly stressful is also a huge relief. With what you said with disconnecting the ears and relying on visual stimuli for virtual movement I do notice it playing with my head a bit and at first it was horrible but as I’ve played games that are extremely linear like Minecraft it helped a bit retraining my brain on what not slanted should look like but games like call of duty it took me time to get back into as the environments aren’t as leveled or linear like Minecraft. Pros and cons. But I appreciate you showing me his post it by far is the most similar to some of my issues that I’ve read on here.:blush:

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Hello again everyone. I thought I was better, but it appears a full reset was in the cards for me.

Around December 20th 2023 I woke up with a bad cold/sinus since my heater space heater shut off in the middle of the night. I noticed my dizziness was really bad tried to go to work had to go home immediately. Spent time at home first couple days then started going out slowly but still just feeling a little dizzy/off but manageable. Was taking pseudoephedrine because usually that helped my dizziness when in regard to a cold. Figured was fluid. Out of safety I started taking my nortriptyline and Lexapro from last year when it was bad on December 23rd.

The day I felt really good, December 30th, randomly toward the night my perception changed back to how it was about a year ago but more intense. Everything looked like I was looking downhill. Staring down a long aisleway felt and looked like staring down a hole. Staring down the street while in the car felt like I was looking downhill. When I force myself to look at any of those scenarios my eyes go into this weird state where they almost become paralyzed like they can’t figure out what they’re looking at. My brain knows it should just look straight and flat but my eyes refuse to see it that way. It’s like looking at an optical illusion that you used to be able to see two images but now you’re forced to see one image only and it’s the weird one you don’t want to see. Even watching TV shows or video games I get this sensation and can’t turn it off.

I’m on 20 mg of nortriptyline and 10mg of the Lexapro. The Lexapro is mostly for the anxiety I’m getting from this. I saw my Neurologist Dr. Tim Hain on the 27th before the perception changes. He could see I had poor balance and still downbeat nystagmus. We thought just a flare up and keep with the meds again. I start PT 3 days from now and I have an appointment 2 days from now for a neuro-opthamologist since last year I was also diagnosed with BVD. I keep having pain in the center of my brow and my left eye. My ears mildly feel pressured at times. Another weird thing is when I lay down I can feel the fluid in my sinus move towards whatever side I’m laying down on and I’ll feel a mildly spinning sensation until the fluid settles. Maxillary. I also can’t sleep on my right side. My body will only let me sleep on my left which is weird because I normally sleep on my right. Everyday I wake up the same and if I feel even mildly better towards the end of the day when I got to sleep it’s a full reset. There’s no more rocking sensation or dizziness like before it’s just straight perceptual symptoms now which I think is worse.

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hey @Maclunkey moved you over here to continue your original intro :+1: … sorry you are having significant symptoms again :frowning:

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Tim Hain will straighten you out. Do you ever feel a rocking back and forth with your dizziness?

I did before now it’s completely perceptual.

Still going at it current daily take

Increased to 30mg Nortriptyline
10mg Lexapro
1,575mg of Dandelion Root
300mg CoQ10
350mg Magnesium Glycinate

After increasing the Nortriptyline I don’t know if that helped or if the Lexapro finally kicked in and I was just more calm. Everything is the same I just seem to have habituated to it a bit better. No typical vertigo just everything is sloped and looks downhill constantly. Weight gain has begun. I’ve been eating like a linebacker likely to the drugs as I did last time. Weirdest part is I can’t sleep on my right side still which is the side I used to always sleep on. It’s been a month and I still can’t sleep on it. Today I lowered my bed incline to flat level after been only sleeping with about equivalent of 2 pillow incline. Results of this switch may be polluted since I was up till 4am last night and woke at 12pm. My sense of time is extremely warped days feel abnormally long what feels like hours is minutes.

I want to be hopeful and say I’m getting better, but I think I’m just adjusting to this and I don’t like that. Mentally I’m going in and out of depressive episodes. I just want to start a family someday and I can’t do that if every year it resets like this and I freak out just looking at the street or watching TV or sitting down at a couch and everything is looking downhill and feeling like I’m being pulled with it. Maybe I’m in a half episode right now I don’t really know. I’m gonna cut this off before I get into a full blown one.

I don’t think I’m getting better but I’m habituating. Everything still looks downhill still can’t gauge objects distance wise or if a surface is flat. I just feel like my anxiety is less now about it. Tried sleeping flat again last night. Woke up with throbbing head pain like if you laid upside down and then lifted your head up right. Going to return to work tomorrow to try it out. My work has been phenomenal working with me and even bent some rules to try and help me out. They’re forcing me to 30 hours a week which is nice but I’m usually working 40 hours and I don’t like feeling incapable even though technically. Same pay just less hours in hopes it helps rehabilitation. Also can play video games a little more normal now. It’s like they’re trying to retrain my eyes. It sucks because it feels like it’s just within my grasp to break down perception of the world back to normal but just right out of reach.

Still dealing with the everything looks downhill and sloped worse in the car but for the most part mentally and physically I’ve adjusted. I’m worried this is my new baseline. Still taking Nortriptyline 30mg and 10mg Lexapro. I have a couple dizzy bouts here and there but nothing too horrible. I just wished this sloped feeling would go away I used to love car rides and now I can’t help but Mildly freak out in the car. Like I said still slightly less than before. I also found a kitten and have taken that in even though I’m allergic so we’ll see how the allergies affect me. I can’t deny the cat distribution system when they send me a cat especially a kitten.

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Sounds to me like a lack of compensation? - if so I’m sure you will eventually compensate and that will go away?

Awww … hope you are very happy with each other! :cat: :man:

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