Office Work vs. Take It Easy - Need Some Insight

Specific Illnesses & Conditions VM/MAV
1

OK, I’m in a bit of a spot here. About 3.5 weeks into verapamil and no “better days” as of yet. I see Hain in a week, but I promised myself I’d stay on verap. for 8 weeks.

In the last 3 weeks, I’ve been doing a lot of staying at home, mostly (a) working from the computer and (b) resting in front of a TV, lying down because I feel OK when I do. I don’t quite understand it, but I can do the home computer quite well, even for extended periods of time.

Now today, I came into my office to try to do some computer work. Even when it’s at its busiest, the office only has 4-5 people, including me, and it’s a very small, quiet office space in a big, fairly empty building. The only real noises are of talking, typing and phones ringing.

We have bright fluorescent lighting, and there’s only one light switch, so I can’t just shut off all the lights. They bug me no end, though, and lately, I usually work at home because lately I tolerate low light much better, including when I’m at a computer. (The monitor’s glow is OK.)

I feel worse in the past 3.5 weeks. Long before I ever saw Hain, I came into the office fairly frequently (even 5x/week at times), because we were on a deadline for a big project. BUT … when I started verapamil, I decided not to come in very often — figured I’d take it easy while I gave the med. a chance. The verapamil itself has given me some occasional low-grade (non-migraine) headaches and head pressure, but now coming into the office and trying to work is harder than it ever was before. I used to be able to ignore the dizziness at least enough that the office laptop wasn’t too bad to use. Nowadays, coming into the office exacerbates the dizziness, and the laptop is very hard to use.

So, as I think I said, I promised not to leave the verap. (or switch, etc) until I’d given it a full 8 weeks, but I’m not sure what to do. One friend feels extremely confident (especially after praying on the matter) that this “is” the med. for me if I give it time, and I’ll trust that, but until then, should I continue taking it easy and working from home, or is it my own fault for not pushing myself enough / being fairly inactive in the last 3 1/2 weeks (i.e., should I push myself to come in)?

1 Like
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George - I think that whether we push ourselves or not is irrelevant to the symptoms. At least for me. Pushing yourself, of course, can sometimes be good emotionally. It seems impossible, sometimes, to find reasons for progression of symptoms. I was wondering what dose of Verapamil are you on. The big mistake I have made was go from med to med without ever getting on a therapeutic dose. I know Dr. Hain doesn’t go so high, but Dr/ Buchholtz told me to go all the way up to 480 of verapamil if lower doses weren’t helping, and stay on that dose for about a month. Then, if there are no changes you can stop it. I got up to 480 with, sadly, no improvements. I really wish this drug was the one for me because I was tolerating it ok. I wish you luck.

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I’m on 120 mg, the low-end (especially since Hain’s site says "starting dose should roughly = weight of patient – and I’m 175), but when I called to ask if they’d up the dose, nobody returned my call.

Hain’s site also says he doesn’t go beyond 240 mg verapamil.

That really bugs me about Hain’s office. I think it’s the front-desk staff. I rarely get calls or messages returned.

Anyway, I think it’s the fluorescent lighting “doing me in,” as I think about things. I see no other reason why my home computer should be more tolerable than the laptop (both screens are decent-sized and LCD’s).

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Hi George,

As I’m sure you know, ultimately this is a personal decision that only you can answer. But since you asked, I will share my experience regarding what works best for me. Being the social being that I am, I am fearful that staying home more than on my very sick days will drag me into a hole of depression and anxiety that will only make my condition worse. So for me, making myself go to work is the right choice even though the environment isn’t as healthy due primarily to the fluorescent lighting, crappy HVAC, and lack of a place to rest. To compensate, I’ve had the fluorescent bulbs removed from the fixtures directly over my workspace, and I wear lightly tinted sunglasses inside whenever I’m having a bad migraine day. I’ve also been known to take a nap in my car, which I may do here shortly.

Coming to work is a distraction for me. My job isn’t conducive to working from home for more than a few days once in a while, so I would have to take a leave of absence to take a longer break. Also, if I were to stay home, I would be constantly thinking about the reason I am staying home and it would stress me out. This is just me and my issue, though. I’m not trying to project it onto you. If you are in a position to work from home and you don’t share the same psychological issues I do with it :wink:, then that might be a good solution for you.

As for the Verapamil, it also gave me low-grade headaches as you describe, but it helped me with vertigo. I suggest you hang in there for the rest of the trial, so in the end you can either say you found the med that works for you or you gave it an honest try and won’t wonder in the future whether you quit too soon.

Bottom line, follow your instincts and take care of yourself!

Marci :slight_smile:

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George,

When all of this started for me it took over six months to find out what was causing this, or at least part of it.

At the time I was unable to do anything other than stay at home and take little baby steps to even get off the couch most days because the motion intolerance was so bad. My office was a larger on where I was constantly exposed to the triggers of migraine and they had even been addressed as such prior to me having the vertigo/wavs/mothion intolerence crash in uly of last year. But when I crashed , I crashed hard.

I have had the headache part of this for years and the light issue had began to become more and more of a problem for me so they did turn off the lights above my desk but they were still there in the rest of the office which I had to operate in on a daily bases. The other problem for me was the sensitivity to smells and chemicals, both of which were a HUGE problem for me at work since 90% of the women wore perfume and there were other smells in the bathrooms, etc …plus the daily cleaning done by the cleaning staff. Those were never addressed to or should I say they never enforced the implementation of policies regarding these issues.

So for me when I had the crash I ended up taking a leave of absence until January and then when I was going to try and go back there was not job for me to go back too.

In retrospect I do not think I could have lasted very long because the symptoms continued to get worse due to the fact I have been unable to tolerate any of the medications at this point.

With that said the staying at home does bring a source of comfort but at the same time I think it has contributed to the intense anxiety I now suffer from because for me I reached a point of feeling “comfortable” with being in a safe enviroment and not worrying about something happening or having another attack when no one was around or I was in unfamiliar surroundings.

I think it is a double edge sword as you have decide what is best for you and what you can tolerate and what you cannot. But if you do stay home I would encourage you to do as many other things at home as you can and still get out when you can to keep the anxiety from taking over your life. Because for me right now that is the biggest struggle and it is not any more fun than the MAV itself.

Follow your instincts and if you are a person of faith ask for guidance and I think you will find your answer.

Best of luck to you as you weigh these two options…either one can be difficult but you must decide which one is best for you.

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I should be thankful that all of you folks here tolerate me with my endless questions. Everyone always does reply in an insightful, thoughtful manner, too, which is really nice.

I think I’ll discuss the matter with the employer (well, the client – I’m freelance, which works to my advantage) and see if we can set up a way to do things primarily from home, maybe with some occasional in-office days.

I tried some sunglasses but they really don’t work. Besides, glasses bug me. If only I could block out the surrounding bright lights, including the one in the panel above me… maybe I can get a really big cardboard box, put it on the desk, stick my head and laptop inside, and… no, that’s no good…

I’d still like to stay with verap., but up the dosage. I think I’ll ask Hain about that when I see him this coming Monday.

Wow, this whole thing never ceases to confuse me. Lie down, feel OK. Sit still at my office computer, feel crummy. Walk around, feel crummy. I’m tired of trying to figure it out … almost.

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george - I have the same problem with them returning calls. I called two times and emailed one with NO response. I think 120 is low. I do not understand why Dr. Hain says to take the mg that correlate with your wt (He told me that too). I am 110 lbs, and there is not even a dose for my weight (the lowest dose is 120). I realized you can cut the pill. Previous conversations with doctors indicated that 120 is only the starting dose. I believe you can continue to go up quite a bit more. Of course, I’m no doctor, but sometimes I feel more knowlegeable than they do. Plus, I am getting back to you more quickly :slight_smile:

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Hi George,

Anyway, I think it’s the fluorescent lighting “doing me in,” as I think about things. I see no other reason why my home computer should be more tolerable than the laptop (both screens are decent-sized and LCD’s).

It may very well be the lighting but I just wanted to recount my experiences with computer screens. I can only tolerate a small number of screens and am usually ok on really small screens. But I can, for example, sit in front of a 24" iMac and I’m fine, however, sit me down in front of the same sized screen of another manufacturer and I just can’t handle it at all. Some Dell laptops I’ve used (small screen) make me dizzy too. There are subtle differences among LCD screens that can kick off symptoms. As an experiment, can you take the home computer to work and see if that makes a difference? You’d at least know for sure it was probably the lighting. No doubt the Verapamil is making things worse at the moment too.

I did what Marci did and pulled the fluoro bulbs out from above my desk area. I really prefer low light or just natural light.

Scott 8)

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Lisa – I think you should mention that next time you visit Hain or talk to him. I know I’m going to say something. As for the pills, 120 seems low for me, though I think I understand why they gave you 120. It sounds about right, especially if you’re 110 lbs.; they begin at 120 and increase in 60-mg increments.

In some areas you may well be more knowledgeable than some of the doctors, and quite likely more knowledgeable than some of the doctor’s assistants and other staff. And you DO get back to me more quickly. (Heck, that you get back to me AT ALL is a step up.)

Scott – I’m not sure what to make of it all re: the screens. This laptop is a Panasonic with a 15" screen; my home setup is a dual-screen display; I think they’re 19" monitors. The reason I really suspect the lights though is that I’m uncomfortable the moment I walk into the office – before I even get to the machine. I also find being outside in the sunlight isn’t so great.

Unfortunately, there is no way I would ever get my home computer here. Between all the cables and everything else… but mostly because the case is an 18" x 18" x 18" cube!

I could pull out the fluorescent bulbs above me … but considering we rent the office (not own it), I think the property manager might not take too kindly to it! I can just see myself standing on my desk and dismantling the whole durned fixture, though … heh …

By the way, this should be obvious to me, I suspect, but can you clarify anyway: “No doubt the Verapamil is making things worse at the moment too.” You mean the low-grade headaches? Or the fact that I’m growing ever-the-more impatient with this fool illness while waiting for the pills to kick in, which should probably be at 1.5x the current strength anyway?

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Hi George,
Here’s my opinion… If there is a chance that your new med is “the med” for you that will allow you to feel better more often than not, then I say give it the full 8 weeks! It sounds like your employer is understanding and flexible, so continue working from home and don’t worry (if you are) about showing up at your work place to have a physical presence there. You are getting your work done and producing results so who cares. Don’t push yourself, there’s no reason too. Figure out the lighting situation later. :slight_smile:

I finally learned through trial and error that for whatever reason fluorescent lighting messes me up. I can only handle an hour in an office setting before my head starts feeling weird. I don’t know why, but on some days, I can spend 8 hours a day working from my laptop when at home. If I work on site somewhere, I’m only good for about 2 hours and then my head starts doing it’s thing and then I’m useless for the rest of the day. I’m used to the screen on my laptop, other peoples computers are hard for me to use. When I look at a different monitor, I can feel it instantly in my head. I had to quit my last job because I had to use their computers, and they would not let me adjust the lighting situation at my cubicle. :frowning: They wouldn’t let me work from home either, which was crazy because my job didn’t require daily interaction with anybody, I just sat in my brightly lit cubicle writing code all day.

Good luck to you with whatever you decide to do!

Crystal

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I have found that pushing myself to do things when I am dizzy, in general, has worked out well for me. There are many days when I feel so dizzy and off-balance that all I want to do is sit or lay quietly in bed. You might know…sort of like a day when you have to crawl across the floor to get something. I try to go ahead and do whatever it was that I had already planned for the day - chores, child-care stuff, even fun activities. Often times I find that my symptoms improve somewhat during the day - not always but very often. Of course, sometimes it backfires… like yesterday when I cleaned the car out - felt much worse afterwards. Even when it backfires I generally feel o.k. because I usually have accomplished something important to me. I try very hard not to let the dizziness (and my other health problems) take my life away from me. That is just what seems to be working for me right now. I hope you find a nice balance for youself.

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— Begin quote from “kritlyn”

I have found that pushing myself to do things when I am dizzy, in general, has worked out well for me. There are many days when I feel so dizzy and off-balance that all I want to do is sit or lay quietly in bed. You might know…sort of like a day when you have to crawl across the floor to get something. I try to go ahead and do whatever it was that I had already planned for the day - chores, child-care stuff, even fun activities. Often times I find that my symptoms improve somewhat during the day - not always but very often. Of course, sometimes it backfires… like yesterday when I cleaned the car out - felt much worse afterwards. Even when it backfires I generally feel o.k. because I usually have accomplished something important to me. I try very hard not to let the dizziness (and my other health problems) take my life away from me. That is just what seems to be working for me right now. I hope you find a nice balance for youself.

— End quote

Kritlyn,

I could have written your exact words. I use the same approach, and most days I feel at least somewhat better after getting going. Almost every morning I feel sick enough to want to stay in bed. Mornings are very difficult for me. But, I figured out that I can still accomplish a lot and usually feel better later on in the day if I push through the dizziness and brain fog while doing my best to minimize triggers. Unfortunately, I’ve been getting to test this all out again over the past week and half since my vertigo has returned. :frowning:

Marci

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— Begin quote from “georgekoch”

I think I’ll discuss the matter with the employer (well, the client – I’m freelance, which works to my advantage) and see if we can set up a way to do things primarily from home, maybe with some occasional in-office days.

— End quote

That sounds like it might be the best option for you in your situation. I hope it works out.

— Begin quote from “georgekoch”

If only I could block out the surrounding bright lights, including the one in the panel above me… maybe I can get a really big cardboard box, put it on the desk, stick my head and laptop inside, and… no, that’s no good…

— End quote

You joke, but I did quite a bit of brainstorming trying to figure out how to block out all the other fluorescent lighting from around my cubicle. I keep the door up on my credenza, and I added an extension made out of brown folders to block out the lights from my boss’ cube. I like to think of it as my own little Tiki bar without the booze. :stuck_out_tongue:

14

George -

With the lights, can you just not stand up and give the fluoros a slight twist? That’s usually enough to cut the power to the light itself without having to remove anything. That’s what I did in here. All of the lights are still there … they’ve just had the “twist”.

With the Verapamil, I was just thinking that as you are adjusting to it, your dizz appears to be worse for now. I don’t know how things go with Verap but hoping it’ll come good soon if you hang in there. When I introduce new drugs I almost always feel worse for a few weeks.

Scott 8)

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— Begin quote from ____

That sounds like it might be the best option for you in your situation. I hope it works out.

georgekoch wrote:If only I could block out the surrounding bright lights, including the one in the panel above me... maybe I can get a really big cardboard box, put it on the desk, stick my head and laptop inside, and... no, that's no good...

You joke, but I did quite a bit of brainstorming trying to figure out how to block out all the other fluorescent lighting from around my cubicle. I keep the door up on my credenza, and I added an extension made out of brown folders to block out the lights from my boss’ cube. I like to think of it as my own little Tiki bar without the booze. :stuck_out_tongue:

— End quote

I did something very similar when i was working and before they remodeled our office we had small cubicles and I got a cardboard box and made almost list a roof above my desk to block out the light and got a very small lamp with a small low light bulb and put in it. It was dark under my roof other than the lamp and the computer screen which I changed the brightness setting down to a low level so that it did not bother me as much. The first time my big boss saw it he was not real happy but i told him, i cannot handle the lights and I have a doctors letter on file that indicates that very thing. After a few unpleasant looks and a long conversation about it , we came to an understanding about it. Though when we remodeled the office that was not an option…we were given very strict restrictions on our work areas at that time. They did turn off the lights above the cubical but the glare from the other lights were still a problem.

So if working from home resolves that for you then I would exercise that option, which is one I never had and would have probably faired better if I had been able to do just that at the time.

16

We have fluroescent lights at my work too. Thankfully, I have my own office, so I had them remove one of the bulbs in each of the set of lights: there are four sets of lights in the ceiling with two, long bulbs in them. I have one in each now and that helps. I also have some information about special tinted glasses that you can wear that help people with migraines. I’ll post it elsewhere soon.

17

For many of us the anxiety created by MAV can be almost as bad as the condition itself. I was diagnosed after taking early retirement and spent almost a year thereafter fixing up my house in order to get in on the market. Not feeling well, there was some security in being home. However, after we sold our house and moved, I felt like I had to get back out in the workforce in order to prove to myself that I could fight the anxiety and do it. I’m now interim manager of a fitness club. While the position will conclude within the next few weeks, I did prove to myself I could fight the brain fog, dizziness and anxiety and hold down a full time managerial position. My next goal is to obtain better control of the MAV. Toward that end, I have a phone consult with Dr. Hain later this afternoon. I’m guessing Dr. Hain will recommend I try something other than the nortripyline that I’m currently taking. If that’s the case, I’m probably going to wait until my job ends before making the transition. Nortripyline is drug #4 and the prior medication changes have been brutal. Good luck to all.

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Heritage - just wondering what dose of Nortriptyline are you on? I was debating between taking nortriptyline or effexor. I tried Nortriptyline in the past but only got up to 20mg. good luck with your phone consult.

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Heritage - good luck with your phone consult with Dr. Hain. Please let us know how it goes.

Marci :slight_smile:

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— Begin quote from “MAVLisa”

george - I have the same problem with them returning calls. I called two times and emailed one with NO response. I think 120 is low. I do not understand why Dr. Hain says to take the mg that correlate with your wt (He told me that too). I am 110 lbs, and there is not even a dose for my weight (the lowest dose is 120). I realized you can cut the pill. Previous conversations with doctors indicated that 120 is only the starting dose. I believe you can continue to go up quite a bit more. Of course, I’m no doctor, but sometimes I feel more knowlegeable than they do. Plus, I am getting back to you more quickly :slight_smile:

— End quote

Hain is a good man and a very sharp doctor, but the office staff is kind of known for being a bit disorganized, and Hain can be a bit of an absent-minded professor type as well.

When I saw Hain for a while, we went from 120mg to 180mg to 240mg in about 7 months. I was weighing in the 190s at that time. I was worried it would drop my blood pressure too low, but it really didn’t drop it much at all. My average BP was about 117/71 with a pulse in the low 50s. On a good day, I could get it down to about 110/65 with a pulse of 45 (I was a long distance swimmer growing up). When I went up to 240mg…once again…not much of a change. He said it was a “weak” drug on the heart.

Might be something to consult your PCP on. We’re all different.